Author: jsabia (Page 7 of 8)

Learning Outcome #3

November 30, 2021 / jsabia

(Active Reading) – Employ techniques of active reading, critical reading, and informal reading response for inquiry, learning, and thinking. (Word Count 440).

Coming into the first semester, I had no idea how to annotate. The extent of what I would do is highlight a quote here or there that I felt was a main point, or one that I could possibly use for my paper. Looking back on this method, I realize that I wasn’t interacting with the piece on a deeper level as I should have been. This is also largely due to the fact that I was told thought my entire education that I should never insert myself into my writing. Since the semester progressed, I have been encouraged to do just that, while also making personal connections to each piece I read. It is because of this that my annotations have largely shifted to focus on relating to the text.

These types of annotations allowed me to easily transition into my own thoughts and ideas within my writing. By starting to connect with each piece on a deeper level, I was then able to translate that understanding over into my writing. An example of this annotation style is seen in my copy of Yasmeen Serhan and Timothy McLaughlin’s piece “The Other Problematic Outbreak”. (Image 1).

Image 1: Annotation from Serhan/McLaughlin “The Other Problematic Outbreak”

By being able to interact with this piece on a deeper level by finding a connection to my own experiences, I was then able to insert myself into my writing in order to strengthen my argument against racism. (Image 2).

Not only did this style of active reading allow me to connect my personal experiences to a topic that I felt a disconnect to (racism), but it also allowed me to strengthen my stance on topics that I was very closely intertwined with, such as empathy. When I was interacting with Paul Blooms piece “Is Empathy Overrated”, I found myself immediately dismissing his claims, as I did not agree with him. However, I was able to connect with his personal connect to the Sandy Hook shooting in Connecticut, and it allowed me to be able to try to understand his stance. (Image 3).

Image 3: Annotation from Bloom “Is Empathy Overrated”

By having this personal connection to this event, as I am from Connecticut, I was able to strengthen my argument against him, as I have very similar experience to him, but was still able to understand the differences between sympathy and empathy. (Image 4).

The use of these active reading techniques have allowed me to improve my annotations as well as my writing, as I am now able to interact with pieces on a deeper level. This interaction allows me to connect with the experiences of the writer and allows me to strength my arguments later on in my own writing.

Learning Outcome #2

November 30, 2021 / jsabia

(Integrating Ideas) – Be able to integrate their ideas with others using summary, paraphrase, quotation, analysis, and synthesis of relevant sources. (Word Count: 295).

At the beginning of the semester, I always found it difficult to blend my ideas with those that I read. The extent of how I would communicate with the authors from the readings would be inserting a quote here or there that I thought made some sense with what I was writing. As my time in this class progressed, I was introduced to the idea of quote sandwiches. Throughout high school, I was told to insert quotes in a way that made them a part of your sentence rather than introducing them and explaining them afterwards.

The quote sandwich taught me that introducing the quote, stating the quote, explaining it in your own words, and then go into your argument or purpose for the quote was exactly what to do. In my previous education I was told that this was boring or ineffective, when in fact it makes the most sense in academic writing. An instance in which I successfully integrated a quote sandwich is in my second paper. (Photo 1).

The red section is the introduction of the quote, the orange is the preface and the quote itself, the green is the explanation and further development of my ideas. I was also able to continue this pattern a second time in order to develop a Barclay paragraph. (Photo 2).

Photo 2: Paper #2 (Quote Sandwich Barclay)

The colors of this paragraph have the same meanings as the one above, although the blue color is the transition rather than another introduction to a different idea. Quote sandwiches have allowed me to collect and gather my thoughts while displaying them in a useful way to my readers. This is a new concept to me, and I am very grateful to be able to continue using the practice going forward in my academic career.

Learning Outcome #1

November 30, 2021 / jsabia

(Recursive Process) – Demonstrate the ability to approach writing as a recursive process that requires substantial revision of drafts for content, organization, and clarity (global revision), as well as editing and proofreading (local revision). (Word Count: 536).

I was always my own harshest critique when it came to my rough drafts of my writing. I was afraid to have errors in my writing and would get frustrated with myself when there would be careless mistakes. All throughout high school, my rough drafts would be graded as if they were a final draft and the grade would later be upgraded after the final draft was completed. It was due to this process that I always found revisions very stressful and would try to make it so that I would not have to revise in the first place. The extent of my “revisions” would essentially be making sure there were no spelling errors and I wasn’t repeating myself.

Throughout the semester, I have learned that a rough draft is supposed to have errors. In fact, it is expected to. It was in learning this that I was able to then develop my revision process which would now include taking in the feedback I was giving by my peers and professor. I would no longer be afraid to completely scrap a section of my writing, as well as not being afraid to repeat my previous statements. I learned that repeating myself is actually expected to a certain extent, as it helps to reinforce my ideas and make them stronger to the reader.

An example of this writing revision process can be seen in the conclusion paragraph of my second essay. In my rough draft (Photo 1), my conclusion was significantly shorter than all of my other paragraphs in my paper. This was largely due to the fact that I felt as though I was repeating myself and I didn’t know how I wanted to expand my ideas.

Photo 1: Rough Draft Paper #2 (conclusion)

My conclusion in my rough draft was very simple and didn’t really serve any greater purpose to my essay other than simply taking up the space of a conclusion. In my revision, I was able to create a conclusion that had a purpose. (Photo 2).

Photo 2: Final Draft Paper #2 (conclusion)

After spending more time with my conclusion, I was able to turn it into something that served a purpose in my writing. I did this by adding more real world connections and giving an idea for a bigger picture of empathy in the future. By creating this possible call to action and look into the development of empathy rather than only my own experiences, I was able to create a conclusion that wrapped up my paper, but also added a level of importance that it was lacking.

My revision process will definitely continue to grow and progress as I write more in the future, but it has come a significant distance from where it was at the beginning of the semester. I now feel confident in the idea that I don’t need to be perfect on the first try. It is perfectly reasonable, acceptable, and expected to be able to fix a paper rather than trying to completely skip over the revision process. By learning this, I feel as though I’ve become a better writer, and I am excited to see where my growth in this process will take me as I learn even more about my writing style in the time to come.

Text to Text Connections

November 13, 2021 / jsabia

Serhan and McLaughlin’s essay, “The Other Problematic Outbreak” largely connects to the concepts and ideas of David Foster Wallace in “This is Water”. Serhan and McLaughlin’s essay centers around the idea that people became racist and prejudiced against Asians during the beginning of the Covid-19 outbreak. They stated how ““if you are seen to be Asian,” Wong told us, “even if you are not coughing or displaying symptoms, people naturally walk away from you”” (4). David Foster Wallace talks largely about how people should not be so quick to judge others and instead need to focus on the idea of what they could be going through. By essentially taking a step back to try and understand that no particular group of people is to blame for the pandemic, then others would not be able to justify the ridiculous prejudice put forth when the pandemic began.

When discussing further examples of similar situations to the Covid-19 travel ban, Sehan and McLaughlin talked about how “still, some media outlets and U.S. leaders continue to refer to the disease as the “Wuhan virus” (4). This statement resonates significant;y with both Konnikova and Chen’s essays as they discuss the ways in which media can twist words to have different meanings. By continuing to use these terms in a way to blame the virus on a particular group of people, the media only fueled the fire of hatred that was beginning to spread. Konnikova and Chen both explore the impact that social media has on the actions of people all over the world, and blasting harmful headlines such as these during a time of extreme upset was a direct attack on innocent people.

Serhan & McLaughlin Photos

November 13, 2021 / jsabia

Serhan & McLaughlin Reading Response

November 12, 2021 / jsabia

What is xenophobia? How does the term relate to the Covid-19 pandemic and the various decisions countries have made in dealing with the virus’s spread?

Xenophobia is the extreme dislike and prejudice for a particular culture or people from other countries; very similar to, if not exactly the same thing as, racism. This relates havilty to the Covid-19 pandemic as many people began to treat Asians differently, as the virus originally came from China. Many countries also used the pandemic as a way to push forward with their own agenda to close their borders to certain groups of people.

2. In what ways does fear factor into the personal accounts and political decision making that Serhan and McLaughlin report on?

Fear factors into these personal accounts and political decisions as it causes people to look for someone to blame and for changes to be made. When people became scared, they wanted to see the government make changes as a means to protect them, not really looking at the bigger picture, but simply looking for any change to occur. Fear also makes people defensive and has them looking for someone to blame, thus creating an unfair prejudice and divide amongst people.

3. How does Serhan & McLaughlin’s journalistic piece relate to Cadogan’s first-person narrative?

This piece relates to Cadogan’s, as they both highlight recent experiences of racism and prejudice. They show that these experiences are still very prevalent in today’s society and that people are being treated unfairly due to things that they simply cannot control, such as their race, ethnicity, or simply where they live.

4. What are your thoughts on travel bans (in the context of the Covid-19 pandemic)? Make your claim and then plant a skeptic or naysayer within the paragraph (name the skeptic, consider the extension of their counterargument, then show why you believe your claim is correct).

In the context of the Covid-19 pandemic, I believe that travel bans were likely a smart idea. While I don’t agree with the idea of countries shutting their borders to a select few countries, I believe that slowing the spread of the disease was a necessary precaution to take. While there are many people that are likely to say that these acts are strictly prejudiced, I will politely disagree. Sure, there were some countries that closed their borders to a select few places as a way to fuel their own political agendas, but the spread did need to be slowed. I believe that borders should have been closed, not only to specific countries, but to every country for a short period of time. The slight delay in the virus allowed for a small window of time where people could get prepared for what was to come, and that I feel was a necessary precaution to take.

Learning Outcomes

November 10, 2021 / jsabia

I believe I have shown the most improvement on “demonstrating the ability to approach writing as a recursive process that requires substantial revision of drafts for content, organization, and clarity (global revision), as well as editing and proofreading (local revision)”. I have been able to write with more flow and put together ideas as I am now less critical of myself during the rough draft process. I now know that my first draft does not need to be perfect and it is absolutely acceptable for there to be a lot of revisions that need to be made before the final draft.

I believe that I still need to work on “ being able to critique their own and others’ work by emphasizing global revision early in the writing process and local revision later in the process”. I am very critical of my own work and not super critical of others. I have gotten slightly better at this as I have been able to figure out that critiquing others’ work during peer review is not mean, it is helpful. But I do plan to continue to lean into this in order to make more meaningful edits to my own papers as well as my peers.

Essay #2 Self-Reflection

November 9, 2021 / jsabia

Describe your essay’s most notable strength, using at least one direct quote from your work to support your choice.

I believe that my most notable strength in this essay was being able to insert myself and write in the first person for large amounts of it. I started off this essay with a personal anecdote where I explained that for “as long as I could remember, I have been blessed and burdened with being an empath. Constantly feeling the emotions of those around me, no matter how negative, and having this overwhelming desperation to help them in any way I can”. I am typically not very good at inserting myself into academic writing, as I was specifically told not to throughout most of my life, but I found that by practicing it with this essay that it allowed me to feel more comfortable doing so.

2. Describe the differences in your revision process from Essay #1 to Essay #2. How has your revision process improved? Call attention to one place in your 2nd essay where revision helped significantly.

My revision process for essay #1 was essentially fixing things like grammar and word choice, whereas my revision process for essay #2 was changing large parts of my essay in order to make them stronger. During my first essay, I didn’t receive much peer feedback, so I didn’t really change all that much, but I received quite a few bits of feedback on my second essay, which allowed me to revise in a more purposeful way. In particular, my conclusion was not finished when it came time to peer review. It was choppy and felt as though it was missing something significant, but after peer review I was able to add more things to it as well as make it flow more seamlessly.

3. Briefly analyze your integration of source material. What techniques did you use to synthesize source materials within your 2nd essay?

Almost every one of my paragraphs was set up as a Barclay paragraph. I found that I was comfortable with that format, and it allowed me to continue to insert the source material in a way that didn’t interfere with the flow of my writing.

4. Copy and paste your final draft’s strongest claim sentence into your post, then analyze it briefly. What makes it your strongest claim? How has your voice been integrated as part of your academic writing so far this semester?

“While I can see a small correlation between empathy and its tight borders being considered close-minded, I think that Bloom’s argument is nothing but ignorant”

I believe that this was the strongest claim that I made in my essay. I think this is largely due to the word choice that I made, as I typically don’t write with enough passion to use the word “ignorant” in an academic piece of writing. I think that I have become better at inserting myself in my academic writing, as I haven’t been able to do so in past classes, but now I am doing so with passion behind what I am writing about. By being able to actually insert myself in my arguments, I am able to have more of a connection with the statements being said, rather than trying to piece together something that feels forced.

5. Paste then analyze your thesis statements from the first and second essay. How do they compare? Note similarities/differences. Which is stronger and why?

Essay #1: Although social media has a reputation for lessening the meaning of in person relationships, it creates connections that are so important they will change one’s life

Essay #2: Although empathy can only be extended so far before overextending oneself, it is ultimately the driving force behind meaningful relationships and an essential tool for understanding the people around you.

My two thesis statements are set up in a very similar format in the sense that they start with a counter and then my argument. The difference between the first and second thesis’, however, is that I added a second argument on my second paper. I feel like the second thesis is stronger, as it provides more of a foundation as to what the paper is going to be about, but I believe that the first thesis is easier to digest and much less wordy than the second.

Cadogan Reading Response

November 5, 2021 / jsabia

When walking in Kingston, Cadogan feels free as he is able to know where he is going and doesn’t feel threatened, even though there is an extremely high crime rate. He isn’t personally targeted for anything in particular when he is there, and he knows familiar faces as he goes on his walks. When he’s in New Orleans, he was immediately considered a threat. He “tried to help a man whose wheelchair was stuck in the middle of a crosswalk; [the man] threatened to shoot [him] in the face, then asked a white pedestrian for help” (7). He was studying in New Orleans, and was treated as a threat by nearly everyone he passed. The same happened in New York, as he was racially profiled by numerous police officers and pedestrians. He felt on edge, as if he was doing something wrong by simply going for a harmless walk.
I have placed quite a few rules on myself while I am walking around campus or my hometown with my safety in mind. I never leave my room without my pepper spray, I typically wear clothing that is not revealing in the slightest, and I am hypervigilant of my surroundings. If I need to walk to my car, or to the forum in the dark, I always make sure to bring one of my guy friends with me, or I am on the phone with somebody at a low volume. I connect with Cadogans feeling of uncertainty and uneasiness as he walks around the different cities. I never feel as though people are considering me a threat; however, I feel like I am the one to potentially be threatened, due to the fact that I am a young woman.
When I was a freshman in high school, I had to dress up for a volleyball game. My sister and I went to get gas at the gas station early in the morning, and I was catcalled by a middle aged man as I was getting ready to get back in the car. This has happened a few times while walking around other cities like New York, New Haven, or Hartford, but this was the firsty timwe that it had happened to me in my hometown. I was thirteen at the time. I kept my head down, my mouth shut, coursed my arms over my chest and got back in the car, while immediately locking the doors. My sister and I never talked about it after that, as it had made both of us feel unsafe and scared of our town.
Cadogans narrative shows just how prevalent racism in America still is, and how people need to start making the active decision to do better. His first-person account and experiences allow there to be a personal connection to this piece, as it shows the reader that this is happening to a genuinely harmless human being. By having such a wide variety of different places and experiences within those places, Cadogan shows the reader how these events happen everywhere, and allows them to want to make change.

Peer Review Revisited

October 27, 2021 / jsabia

This time for peer review is fairly equal to last time, as my partner only wrote the introduction paragraph. I feel like I was more confident with the edits I was making in the sense of being able to make a few sentences easier to understand from the reader’s perspective. However, I once again feel like I haven’t been able to help to the best of my ability because I wasn’t able to go through the whole paper. I definitely found it easier to be more analytical with what I was editing this time rather than focusing more on the surface level spelling and grammatical errors. I felt like I got more out of him editing my paper this time though. He went more in depth as to what I need to change as well, which was really helpful.